|No, I am not back to looking like this|
On Day Five, I was either flying (in a plane) or walking through airports until midnight. And, here is where my fast started to get to me. It wasn't the hunger because, truly, by Day Five it was not there, and it wasn't thinking about food, although that still was there. Rather, it was the weakness I felt when moving about. It is really strange because last time I fasted (okay, I was nineteen years old - see photo at left), I didn't feel that way and buzzed about for all ten days. So I did a lot of reading and I found varying reports of how weak one might feel and some reported weakness in the beginning but it lessened as the days progressed and others apparently spent their entire fast in a hammock; age didn't seem to matter.
And that was my problem. The weakness seriously bugged me and I really noticed it as I crawled to my connecting flight, worried I wouldn't make it to that gate in another state by the time boarding ended. I didn't have any peanuts or cookies or pretzels on the flight and I made it through the day, but I remember looking fondly at a wheelchair as I deplaned that I really wanted to sit in. Back at home, I woke on Day Six to feeling still like 1/4 of a human and although I knew this did not mean I was going to kick the bucket (I know some of you will say...."Oh, your body was crying for food!"), I didn't want to continue to be that weak because I had stuff to do. I wasn't on a prolonged vacation and I couldn't just lay about for the rest of the month, so I decided to break the fast. I did diluted juices, then juice, then fruit. Today I have had a salad.
I am a bit bummed that I didn't get to finish the fast as I wanted. If it hadn't been for the weakness, I think I would have carried on. I don't regret the try, though, as I learned a lot of interesting things about food and my brain's attitude toward it. I think the most fascinating thing I learned is that I too often eat without thinking about why and what; this is what I hope to change. I also find pretty fascinating that life is incredibly boring without food, mostly because our culture is built around food in every single social occasion, which I think is rather a terrible thing. At least when I was growing up, I remember food played a much smaller part and, even when a social occasion did include food, it was often in small proportions. This is something America needs to fix if we want to be truly a healthier population.
Ah, well, on to the Merriweather Post Pavilion in Maryland with my daughter to see Sarah Mclachlan. As I lay out on the blanket listening to her sing (Sarah, not my daughter), I just hope I don't eat an entire bag of Doritos.
Criminal Profiler Pat Brown
July 5, 2012